Life with Teens

Never a dull moment.  They cause unfair amount of stress and grey hair.  They are convinced they know everything, or at least know more than I do on any given topic.  They have it all figured out, need nor want advice and seemingly believe I can't possibly relate to the trials, tribulations and daily drama of their lives. Yet, we don't just throw them to the curb when they cross the threshold to become a teenager.  We dig deep and find reasons why we like having them around despite the heartburn and grey hair they bring about.

Camryn's Snapchat response to me getting bit by a spider.

1. They make me laugh. Their smart mouths and sharp tongues are surprisingly witty.  Not always at the best of times but just so happens when I need it most, they have me in stitches.  

2.  They are helpful.  They can let the dogs out and not run out with them.  They can bring in groceries from the car. They can unload the dishwasher, take out the trash, fix my phone when I have messed up some settings, or teach me he to use the latest apps. 

3. They can wipe their own butts.  That's all.  

4. They can cut their own food and pace their bites at a proper rate while using table manners.  Often, however, the table is where the quick wit comes about and either gets them quickly dismissed or has me nearly peeing my pants.  

5.  They love their siblings and would do anything in the world for them.  Truly. They are all very lucky to have each other but the non-teen has no idea just how fortunate he is to have his big brother and sister. 

6. They do not bite, pull hair or scratch me in public. Or private for that matter.  

Austin helping his brother drive a golf ball.

7.  They may not follow the rules to a T but they do not throw their drink cups on the floor after every sip.  Or out of the window of the car.  

8. They bathe themselves.  Drying off before leaving the shower may not be completely mastered by all just yet but they are able to take care of showering all by themselves.  

9.  When they are tired, they go to bed.  The end. 

10. They keep in touch in a myriad of ways throughout the day.  Call, text, Facebook, Instagram, snapchat.  I am always an app away from communicating with them no matter where they are.  And they aren't too cool to respond to Mama.  

I miss my kiddos being little. I miss holding their hands to cross the street, tucking them in, reading them bedtime stories, watching the same movie a dozen or so times until the next favorite flick came along.  I miss practicing math facts and spelling words in the car.  I miss ice hockey practice and cooking classes.  I miss candy cane ponytails and painting nails.  And so much more.  But I could not be more proud of the young adults they are becoming.  They are learning and growing every day at seemingly warp speed.  While I can't slow the hands of time, I can enjoy every minute of every stage with all of them knowing that all too quickly they will outgrow it and move on.  

WWE Wrestling

From the time Austin was a little boy he loved WWE wrestling.  He had a huge collection of wrestlers, a couple of rings, belts, posters and even VCR tapes of special events or match-ups.  He spent countless hours playing with his guys or practicing moves with his cousins or friends.  As time went on, I learned a great deal about the world of wrestling myself by default.  I learned who the Undertaker, Stone Cold Steve and The Rock were and recognized their entrance songs.  I learned about moves like the DDT, pile driver, stunna, and people elbow.  I smelled what the Rock was cookin.  I learned about crooked refs and dirty wrestlers and their cheating cohorts.  Never did I realize that all this seemingly useless knowledge would pay off one day.  I now know how to defend myself every night when I step into the ring, er bed, to tuck in my three year old.  He's a WEE natural and has mastered kicking me in the jaw, sippy cup slam to the brow bone, head butt to the bridge of the nose, along with scratching, hair pulling and occasionally biting.  And they said he'd never be an athlete.

Finally sleeping toddler.  Not pictured, one battered and exhausted Mama.

Parenting Ain't Easy

It's true.  There is very little about raising children that is easy.  Being a mother is the best blessing I could have ever received.  I enjoy watching my kids grow and learn.  I often wish it would slow down a little but but for the most part I love seeing my offspring develop into kind and productive contributions to society.  There are times however when I just want to throw the towel in on the whole gig.  It ain't easy!  It is not fun to be the bad guy.  To hand out rules or consequences and then actually follow through is probably my weakest area of parenting.  I'm a sucker and a pushover, no doubt about it.  Sometimes, though, putting your foot down is the only answer.  We all know that doing the right thing isn't always the easy thing; in fact it rarely is.  But that doesn't make it less right.  Some issues require a firm, heavy hand to drive home a message or help illustrate a life lesson.  Some issues are more a literal matter of life and death.  I can only speak for myself here, but if my child were diabetic, I'd force them to stop drinking soda and eating Tastycakes.  As much as I would sympathize with the torture that would ensue, I would know that forbidding the deadly vices was a matter of necessity.  There may be withdrawal symptoms.  There will definitely be fights and fits.  There will likely be threats.  But no matter how heavy it weighed on my heart, I would know that the sugar ban was not only the right thing, it was necessary.  I would know that in time, perhaps a few days, maybe a few weeks, my child would start to feel better about my ban.  They won't like the ban, they won't agree with the ban, but they will start to understand why it became necessary and, with maturity, they will come to appreciate the love that encouraged me to do the right thing.   I can't understand the parental logic of "there's nothing we can do about it.  The child knows the consequences and is willing to drink the soda so, nothing else we can do".  I call bullshit.  Stand up for your child.  That's why they have and need parents.  I am about to turn the big 4-0 in a few short weeks.  I hope that if I were about to make a monumental mistake, my parent would stop me.  Talk to me. Explain their point of view.  As an adult, if I decided to continue down the path, so be it.  But once a parent, always a parent.  There is no job that requires more dedication, conviction and backbone.  This parenting gig is not for the weak and faint of heart.  Just ask my chest pains.

My family at a Sweet Sixteen party photo booth, August 2015

Favorite Part of My Day

Glenn IV running to me at daycare pick-up

I'm not a morning person, by a long shot.   Many days start of with rushing around, dodging traffic, getting the little man to the appropriate school, dropping Camryn off at her school during the school year and trying my hardest to be as close to on time as possible.  A pretty typical morning for many working Moms.  It takes until about 10 am before I really wake up and feel ready to tackle my day. In my work, every day is different.  Sometimes it is a whirlwind of one problem after then next from the second I walk through the door. Other days are a little more laid back where I actually cross things off on my to-do list.  I enjoy my work and my co-workers.  It never fails, however, around 3 pm I start the countdown.  An hour and a half until I leave to go pick up my little man from school.  The last hour seems to take three hours and although I am most productive and at peak performance in the afternoons, in the back of my mind, I just can't wait to leave.  Who could blame me, really?  With the smile on this sweet little face running toward me each afternoon it has quickly become my favorite part of the day.  

Home

Some things in life just remind you of the comforts of home.  Home isn't a building.  It isn't a place in your favorites of your GPS. It isn't even necessarily where you sleep at night.  Home to me is my family.  Where I am free to be me and always accepted without question. Where I am never judged and always welcome with no invitation necessary.  Home is a feeling of security and warmth.  Unconditional love even through all the crazy, trials, tribulations and mistakes. No matter where or when.  No matter who you are sitting in a room with or at what stage of life.  Certain things can take you home in an instant. There is no place like home.

A smoothie in a glass that my Mom gave me.

Learn Something New Every Day

August 6, 2015
Learn Something New Every Day

Glenn IV eating a fruit cup on his own.

Glenn IV is just over 3 years old.  He started a new preschool program at BCIU in July. He goes to school three days a week - Tuesday through Thursday.  While he is there, Glenn gets theraputic services for speech, occupational and physical therapy through a specialized classroom setting.  Glenn is developmentally delayed globally.  Although he babbles, he generally is not verbal.  Even words that he can say (Balloon), he often will not say on comman or on sight.  He does know a fair amount of sign language.  He is very happy and extremely energetic.  Glenn is more on target for a 12 month old than a 3 year old, espeically in emotional and social development.  He doesn't understand how to play well or have any concept of manners or spacial awareness. If he becomes frustrated, he simply moves on to the next thing instead of throwing a tantrum or pushing himself to continue to try a task.  Glenn is also very small for his age.  He wears a size 24 month clothing.   He's short but he's growing.  For almost three years, he was diagnosed with failure to thrive.  He's had acid reflux which caused significant vomiting throughout his first three years of life.  Despite that, Glenn has always been a happy little guy and a true joy for us to be around.  Glenn has a diabolical opposition to wearing shoes and socks.  He also has an odd habit of putting his socks in his mouth and chewing on them at every opportunity.  

Today I dropped him off at his preschool.  He's in a classroom of three to five year old students.  They are lightyears ahead of him in development.  Every morning I get my Mama Bear neck hair all afluff when the "mean" little children don't like Glenn or have negative things to say about him.  Today, however, I was determined to change my mindset.  They aren't mean.  They are children.  They simply don't know and understand. Glenn looks like a normal toddler - a baby to them - so they don't grasp why he's in their classroom.  As I was putting his shoes on him in the classroom this morning, the typical crowd of 3-4 children drew around us.  They scatter to clean up their puzzles when they see Glenn coming knowing he will trample right over them.  They lift the lego bin out of his reach when he gets there, all too aware that he will spill the bin and put legos in his mouth.  They know he is a destructo-boy once I let him loose and everything and anything is fair game.   As they are putting away the floor puzzle, mean girl 1 asks me once again "Why does he put everything in his mouth?" as she does many mornings. I respond that he's smaller than they are and he's still getting some of his teeth so he chews on things to help his teeth feel better.  She was satisfied.  For the moment.   "Why can't you put his shoes on him at home?" she asks with a disapproving tone in her voice.  I explain that Glenn doesn't like wearing his shoes so he takes them off as soon as I buckle him in his car seat.  Then he stuffs his socks in his mouth and chews on them.  She thought that was gross and then immediately expressed concern that he could choke.  Mean child 2 then asked "Why doesn't he talk to us?".  I responded that Glenn can't talk with words but that he does know some sign language.  Mean girl 1 is intrigued and wants to know what that it.  I explained that he uses his hands (and sometimes his feet) to make signals for what he wants.  She signed eat to me and said "You mean when he does this?"  I told her that was exactly what I meant and told her that when Glenn did that he wanted food or drink. I showed her signs for "More" and "Please" and she practiced them.  Her attitude and demeanor changed.  She was softer and more accepting.  She went on to giggle and said "Glenn makes a big mess when he feeds himself!".   Yes, yes he does.  I said he's still learning.  And I thought to myself, aren't we all.  I learned that these children don't want to be mean.  They don't know.  They don't understand.  It is different and different isn't always easy.  I left as Glenn stuck his hand in someone's rice crispy cereal with a smile on my face.  

Hopefully he and his classmates have a great day today.  

A Little About Me

Hello!  Welcome to my blog.   A bit about myself and why I decided to start blogging...

First and foremost, I'm a Mama.   I have three beautiful children - Austin who is now a high school graduate and 18 years old, Camryn who is 13 years old and in middle school, and Glenn IV who is a very active, special needs three year old who just recently started a preschool program.   Life with these three is never, ever boring.  They keep me on my toes, provide endless laughs, and we've shed a few tears along the way as well.  I wouldn't change a thing.

I'm a wife to a great husband, Glenn.  We have been married for just a couple of years and have been on a whirlwind rollercoast ride of life ever since but in each and every day he tries to make me smile regardless of what else is going on in our worlds. Glenn inspires me to see the good in each day and each situation.  He encourages me to be a better me each day.  I couldn't imagine this ride of life with anyone else by my side.  

I'm an Executive Assistant.   I work for a medium sized division of a very large company.  My office is about 45 minutes from home and I very much enjoy my job, my coworkers and my boss.   The company I work for huge but leg I work in services power plants - build, maintain, modify, decommission - wind, gas, coal, nuclear.   It is very interesting place to be and I am never at a loss for things to do.

I am a daughter to Bruce and Bonnie whom have retired to North Carolina - which is about eight hours too far away if you ask me.

I am a sister to two other sisters, both four years apart from me - Beth is older and Brandi is younger. I'm not sharing any of our ages.

I am a friend.   I have a small, close circle of friends whom I don't get to spend nearly enough time with. They are both close to home and across the US but always near at heart no matter how long between visits.          

I decided to start the blog because life is stressful, chaotic and more joyous than I ever could have imagined.  Couple that with my impatient and emotional nature and you have the recipe for a good cry at any given moment for any number of reasons.  I wanted a place to put my thoughts and experiences as we tackle each day.

I don't take care of myself the way I should, have the diet of a five year old, drive too fast, spend too much, don't really make time for hobbies but I do love the life I live every day.  I hope you enjoy the bits and pieces of those days that I will share with you here.

XOXO,

Bridget

My Family - Myrtle Beach boardwalk, April 2015

* Small disclaimer - most (if not all) of my posts are written and published late at night from my mobile phone.  Sometimes with a toddler foot in my throat.  I am not a professional writer and my rambling posts may at times be incoherent garbled Mom brain mush.  Please be kind and ignore typographical or grammatical errors.